My son's school was closed today, which always leaves us scrambling. Because my husband couldn't take our guy to work, and because I don't want him at my school for two days in a row, I took today off. I found that staying at home with my son is as interesting as always.
During summer, we can go outside, swing, nap, watch the birds, read, and rarely go inside. With cooler temperatures, it's more difficult for us. I know we could suck it up and put on some winter jackets, but when I take a day off during the school year and I'm not sick, I need to do some work. We trip over one another more frequently on days like today.
He was banished to his room for a significant portion of the morning. We refer to his room as 'the cave' because it's dark, filthy and has a particular boy odor. Most likely, it's the smell of unemptied trash cans and dirt. His job was to polish his furniture and clean up his room so we don't trip over his stuff or sneeze too heavily from the dust. Banishing him to his room gave me two and half uninterrupted work hours, which was heavenly. And his room looks better too.
I miss my son during our school year. We are so busy with work, homework, karate, and Scouts, it seems as though we never see one another. It's no wonder we struggle when we're first home with one another in June. We must readjust and get to know one another again. I'm also finding a distance forming between us. I know most of it has to do with his age. He needs me less, and he wants me to hug and kiss him less. We seem to talk less as well. I'm trying not to let my heart break; I know it's important for him to begin forging his identity.
But as I was laying in bed this morning, I remembered when he would 'sneak' into my room and crawl in bed with me. We'd cuddle, hug, kiss, and giggle until one or both of us was hungry. I miss those times. Now hugging is a wrestling match, and trying to kiss him is nearly impossible.
Staying at home with my son, on occasion, gives me a chance to be with him, to talk with him, maybe even to sneak a kiss or two before he realizes what I'm doing. And during the school year, it allows us to do something special...like go to lunch and see a movie. Our time together is fleeting, and I try to make the most out of it.
I miss his childhood, but I look forward to his next phase.
