It's May, which means students are graduating from high school and college, moving forward with the next phase of their lives. I find May a difficult month; granted, seniors in high school are terribly difficult and annoying this last month of school, but it's hard to say goodbye, especially to those students I've nurtured and loved for the past four years. It's hard because IF they come and visit they are no longer the same person they once were--and they shouldn't be! But our meetings are slightly more awkward, and sometimes I don't like who they've become.
As the seniors' last day arrived, I found myself weepy. I can usually say goodbye, granted roughly and without much grace, but I don't cry. This year I had to say goodbye to my advisement class, students I have had every other day for the past four years. And that was far tougher than I imagined.
I clearly remember the day the freshmen arrived and met with their Link Crew Leaders, older students who volunteer to help freshmen navigate through their first year of high school. One student, on her way out, wished me luck with the group, and I walked in to find a few student wreaking havoc on the room. These same students, Cal and Dan, made life miserable for all of us for the remainder of freshmen year. I would bring food, and they would make a mess. They threw candy and gum in corners of the room. Dan even would leave freshly chewed gum under his desk, including when he was a junior.
At the same time, I had bright spots. Shelly, a geeky young girl with a passion for flourescent colors and singing, was someone who wanted to keep to herself, so I talked and talked to her, coaxing her out of her shell. James and Camden were also geeky young me, but they smiled and greeted me each morning cheerfully. Leslie concerned me; she dressed provocatively at 14 and I knew she would have a baby before her senior year, which happened. But she was nice and treated me with respect. Madison was sweet, but she sadly grew obnoxious under the influence of students like Cal and Dan, and we ended four years later, not speaking to one another.
Sophomore year was no better. While Cal transferred out of my advisement class, he often would pop in and disrupt the group. Ultimately, he decided to attend another school, which didn't necessarily improve our class. Dan and Stacy began to act up, disrupting and disrespecting me and the other students. I had to stop one young man from hitting Dan, which was hard because Dan deserved to get smacked. Students were put into the class, and then they would leave the class, changing our numbers and dynamics. Through it all, I had my core group of students who treated me well: Shelly, James, Camden, Carla, Leslie, and Harry.
By junior year, I had had it with Dan. He was hateful, and while his parents, Dan, and I all tried to remove him from my class, our administration thought the problem was with me and refused to transfer him elsewhere. He was horrible, hateful, and if we didn't play a sport to his specifications, he would throw the game and cause us to lose. We came to blows in March of their junior year. I told him he wasn't playing a game, and he told me to get out of his face, he had more important people to talk to. I took him to the office, where he continued to mouth off and disrespect me in front of administrators, who still thought this situation was my fault. It wasn't until Dan mouthed off to a female administrator that I was exonerated and he was moved elsewhere. Stacy, too, wanted out of the class, and she was moved as well. Finally, we had a good group.
Our senior year was our best year. We began with 28 or 29 kids as freshmen, but we ended up with 17. A couple of kids had joined our class over the past two years, adding humor and intelligence to the group. We actually could play as a team and have fun, and we even won a few games! We enjoyed hanging out with one another, talking about problems, families, and school. So it was no surprise when, on the last day, I cried. After four years and several problem students, we bonded together, we were a little family.
And now our little family has left the nest. I wish them well and will certainly miss them.
